Right Things for the Wrong Reason

"Be careful not to practice your righteousness in front of people, to be seen by them. Otherwise, you will have no reward from your Father in heaven. So whenever you give to the poor, don't sound a trumpet before you, as the hypocrites do in the synagogues and on the streets, to be applauded by people. I assure you: They've got their reward! But when you give to the poor, don't let your left hand know what your right hand is doing so that your giving may be in secret. And your Father who sees in secret will reward you." – Matthew 6:1-4

When I was a younger woman, maybe even a teenager, I discovered this truth about myself: it made me feel good to do nice things for others. I used to make a point to do nice things, because I liked the way it made me feel. I felt good about myself while I was helping someone else. To me, it was the best of both worlds. In my mind, everyone benefitted.

But I was wrong. I didn't delude myself about my reasons for helping others; I always knew it was really about me. I just didn't understand what I was doing to myself. Helping others was simply another way for me to feed my own selfishness.

It doesn't sound like a bad deal, helping others to make yourself feel good. But it has the same fatal flaw as the belief that marriage is all about feeling love.; when it stopped feeling good, I didn't want to do it.

My help was fickle. It depended less on the other person's need and more on my desire to feel good about myself. But this is not true love. Christ's love taught me that. I am supposed to love others and consider them as more important that myself. If we all lived by Christian love, live would be a utopia. Crime and deception would disappear. Earth would be heavenly.

But this kind of love does not come naturally. The kind of love that does not depend on how I feel requires work, sacrifice and humility. For this reason, Christian love is an ideal that humanity will not achieve on its own. Not many people are willing to live this kind of life; not with the level of commitment that it requires. But this is what makes the love of Christ different. This is why He asks us to give our entire beings to Him. This is what He gave to us. And this is what we have to offer the world: a radical, beautiful, life-changing kind of love.

I challenge myself and anyone who reads this to show Christ to the world and commit to Him, to being like Him, to showing His love to the world and, by doing so, to make the world a better place.

Schizophrenic Blogger

I can't quite seem to commit. I keep changing my mind about what I want to put on this blog. I originally created this blog because I was doing Bible Study and wanted to put my thoughts and any works I created online. I have since decided to put many other things on this blog. In part, I've thought, "Well, who's interested in what I write on the Bible? Maybe I should put personal things on this blog." And so I did. But then I thought that I should do some writing about homeschooling and I still was doing Bible Study writing. In short, I haven't been able to decide what to do.

I created another blog, about homeschooling. But I haven't put anything up yet because I thought maybe multiple blogs would be too much. Then, I thought putting everything on this one blog would be confusing. I mean, is this about Bible Study, homeschooling, or my own family life? I know, I know, this is crazy.

Well, I have some Bible Study thoughts that I want to put up... just to see what anyone thinks. So, here I go. I am dedicating this blog strictly to Bible Study... and will write on separate blogs for homeschooling and personal life. If it's too much to ask of my friends to try to keep up with... I'm sorry. But, really, I write primarily for myself anyway... to keep up the skill.

And... there's a part of me that really wants to communicate with the masses, you know.

So, here goes... I have decided... this blog is dedicated!

Men Like Darcy and Leopold

I have read the book, Pride and Prejudice, and watched the movies and TV miniseries an untold number of times. For some reason, the story never gets old for me. Jane Austen was a genius with words and Pride and Prejudice was her masterpiece. No other book of hers has been more filmed, nor spawned more "sequels." But though Elizabeth is the heroine of the book, my fascination and the fascination of numerous authors centers on another character: Darcy.

Elizabeth intrigues us with her wit and her thoughts as she wades through nineteenth century life. She is like a friend; the kind of friend we would like to have or the kind of woman we would like to be. But Darcy remains largely a mystery to us. Yet, what we do know of him makes us want to know him more.

What are these mysterious qualities? Darcy is dignified, protective, honorable and willing to improve. He possesses timeless qualities which are admirable even though they are not fashionable in our day. These traits come together in such a way in Darcy, that he draws even us, the readers of any time, to him.

What do I mean? Darcy's dignity allows us to respect him, even when we disagree with him. Darcy doesn't lose his temper or act like a fool. In his mind, Darcy doesn't lose his temper or act like a fool. In his mind, Darcy is always representing something greater than himself: his family. And he is careful to act in such a way that he doesn't dishonor his family in the public arena. Even when Darcy is wrong, he is doing what he believes to be right.

Jane Austen writes love into Darcy's otherwise cold dignity. We read about the love and care he provides for his sister. He treasures her, worries about her and generously gives to her. He has taken his dual role as brother and guardian seriously and we see that a gentler Darcy exists in private; in a place we rarely get to see in the book.

Darcy's desire to do the right thing extends even to admitting he is wrong and taking action to remedy the situation. In Pride and Prejudice, we meet a Darcy that is proud and mistaken in his appraisal of those around him. But we watch him sacrifice a false sense of being right to achieve the goal of making things right. Ultimately, Darcy is willing to change in order to become a better man.

Leopold, from the movie, Kate and Leopold, shares some of Darcy's traits. Though Leopold's situation in life differs somewhat from Darcy's they share some of the qualities I've listed above. What we learn from Leopold is how such a man would interact with a 21^st century woman.

Kate and Leopold shows us the story of how a 19^th century Leopold leaps into the 21^st century. Along with making humorous discoveries about modern American life, Leopold falls in love with a modern American woman. As the story unfolds, we learn that Leopold's sense of dignity and honor extends to Kate. Leopold treats Kate with a great deal of respect, and he wonders when she does not treat herself with the same level of respect. He even tries to protect Kate from her unscrupulous boss, who tries to use his power to seduce Kate.

And what about Darcy? How does Darcy respond to women? The answer is that he treats them with no loess respect than he does men. Both men and women are equally open to condemnation or respect from Darcy. He even defers to his aunt and allows her dignity rather than exposing her foolishness; a grace which he also extends to Elizabeth's own mother, a decidedly foolish woman.

Darcy and Leopold are figments of someone's imagination. Yet, how many women long for a man she can respect? Many of us do. And we long for men who will treat us with respect, not because they have simply granted us some measure of equality or superiority, but because they treasure us.

Darcy and Leopold are men who honor the women they love because honor is something they value and because they believe the women they value deserve honor, alongside dignity, virtue and protection.

Oh, that parents would teach their sons about dignity, virtue honor and responsibility and that sons would embrace and adopt these traits as their own.